When I was just a kid
I had no money at all
I didn’t have the extra quid
To spend for decking the halls
So the only little pine
For my family and me
Was a schmappy crappy Christmas tree
Then I got a little older
And I got me some dough
So I went down to buy a tree
But it was covered with snow
couldn’t tell until it melted
There on Christmas Eve
It was a schmappy crappy Christmas tree
It’s getting late at the Christmas tree lot
And the trees worth the getting are already got
There’s a runt in the corner sitting all alone
Hey momma, Maybe we could give him a home?
So I finally got a tree
A little taller than me
I ain’t hatin’ decoratin’
But you wouldn’t believe
That I was dreaming
bout simple the way it used to be
With a schmappy crappy Christmas tree
Solo
There ain’t no correlation with
The size of the gift
And the happiness you’re feeling near
The ones that you’re with
When you’re kissing, reminiscing,
sitting happy beneath
Any schmappy crappy Christmas tree
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